Oh many a peer of England brews
Livelier liquor than the Muse,
And malt does more than Milton can
To justify God’s ways to man.
Ale, man, ale’s the stuff to drink
For fellows whom it hurts to think.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.