“

You ever wear a bathing suit because you've run out of clean underwear?

Louis C.K.

Quotation #13395

About This Quote

Attributed in Judy Brown, The Comedy Thesaurus: 3,241 Quips, Quotes, and Smartass Remarks (2005)

Source: Attributed in Judy Brown, The Comedy Thesaurus: 3,241 Quips, Quotes, and Smartass Remarks (2005)

“

Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

"My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I've finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake...." — Dave Barry

“

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

“

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did–in his sleep. Not yelling and screaming like the passengers in his car.

“

Challenge yourself with something you know you could never do, and what you'll find is that you can overcome anything.

“

What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.

Henry S. Haskins

Loading...