“I can't get past the fact that food is coming out of my wife's breasts. What was once essentially an entertainment center has now become a juice bar.Paul Reiser
“I've always, always wanted to give birth. To kittens. I figure it would hurt less, and when you're done, you'd have kittens!Betsy Salkind
“I was born by Cesarean section, but you can't really tell. Except that when I leave my house, I always go out the window.Steven Wright
“Babies all over the world are what I like to describe as ‘citizens of the world.’ They can discriminate all the sounds of all languages, no matter what country we’re testing and what language we’re using.Patricia Kuhl
“She's screaming like crazy. . . . You have this myth you're sharing the birth experience. Unless you're circumcising yourself with a chainsaw, I don't think so. Unless you're opening an umbrella up your ass, I don't think so!Robin Williams